HOW TO BE A SERIAL KILLER pokes fun at the self-help literature industry and motivational speakers in general. There are so many ways to get off track while pursuing the perfect life, and an even greater number of pop-psychologists and gurus out there to lead the masses astray. Mike Wilson has found the perfect method of br getting your life back on track and achieving a meaningful existence. Mike teaches his method in an exciting seminar series: How To Be A Serial Killer. Mike tells all of his students: You have what it takes, you just have to pull the trigger on the life you deserve. Students rave about Mike's depth of knowledge on the subject of serial killing and his endless enthusiasm and zest for life. One student described Mike as a tasty smoothie made from a little bit of Charles Manson, some Tony Robbins, and a sprinkle of the messianic charisma of Jesus. Mike administers his first one-on-one tutorial when he recruits a lost soul named Bart to be his pupil in the art of serial killing. Mike's 10-lesson program includes weaponry, corpse disposal, keeping things from loved ones, and many other pearls. As Mike begins to teach Bart more and more about the ways of successful serial killing, it becomes more and more difficult to hide the truth from his girlfriend Abigail (Laura Regan. And when she does inevitably find out, Mike's life as serial killer gets thrown for a serious loop. Now, devastated by the loss of the love of his life, and with the cops on his tail for the first time in his life, Mike and Bart retreat to Mike's desert hideout to make preparations for their escape to Mexico. But when a local sheriff's department interrupts their br preparations, all hell breaks loose, and Mike must learn a lesson of his own: how to deal with police standoffs and full-scale gunfights.(12**)